It’s healthier to heal the hurt as loss and learn how to make the best life for yourself with mature forms of love as an adult person.The son’s efforts to ‘make peace’ between his wife and his mother while walking the ‘line’ between them is quite demanding.The dysfunction often shows up the clearest in their relationships with others.A narcissistic mother’s marriage (worse if she doesn’t have a husband) often suffers when unhealthy triangles dominate her love-life.We had a GREAT question asked to us on our “The Purpose of No Contact” page.It was such a great question, in fact, that I thought it would be helpful to several others in a similar situation if I wrote a post about it!In my experience there’s always an underlying well of resentment in these men.Look at how much they have to pay attention to everyone else’s needs while sacrificing their own.
When the triangle consists of son-wife-mother, the narcissistic mother’s control in her son’s marriage is bound to create marital problems for him and his wife.This triangle indicates that there are two women vying for one man. Conflicts increase over time and allegiances are strained.Of course this kind of emotional arrangement can get pretty complicated when her son’s wife is trying to get her mother-in-law’s ‘love.’ A lot of people are psychologically immature when they get married and try to compensate for what they didn’t get in childhood (love) now from their spouse’s family. Problem is, it’s bound to be disappointing when your mother-in-law is narcissistic.Here’s the question: The first thing I want you to do is to take a look at that picture at the top of this post.Can you tell by looking at that picture if that child was conceived in love? It is a human being whom God did not just “allow” to come into this world–He was actively involved in the conception and creating of life–even if the coming together of the sperm and the egg was through sinful circumstances.Can you tell there is an underlying emotional maybe physical competition going on in this message? When you are truly married you are committed 100% to another woman, your wife/lover.